Matthew 21: Okay, someone correct me here, because it looks like JC directs two disciples at Bethpage to steal an ass and a colt, so that it fulfills prophecy (Is. 62:11) that JC completes by adding a couple verses about the prophecy in need of a colt and an ass. In any event, two disciples become horse thieves here. JC mounts the horse, the multitude (it reads kind of like an Occupy camp here) litter the countryside with clothing and perform uncontracted tree work. JC is announced to the multitudes. JC enters the temple, overthrowing the merchants, and restoring the house to one of prayer, all the while healing the infirmed. On to Bethany for lodging at night. En route on return to Jerusalem, JC finds a fruitless fig and kills the tree, in demonstration of the power of prayer. Two sons working in vineyard parable, (commit/don’t follow up v. don’t commit/do) The wicked husbandmen killing off bondslaves and the heir is a long and kind of difficult approach to a demonstration of what the Pharisees are primed to do.
On the bright side, crucifixion was quite common during Roman rule, and it was only partly personal.
Matthew 22: The marriage feast is a parable whereby the invitees ignore the king’s invitation to a dinner, take captive the king’s captives, kill the captives, get themselves killed, and the king’s new captives recruit partygoers, one of whom isn’t wearing proper attire. Teeth gnashed. JC lets the Pharisees know how he feels about their Caesar coins. The Sadducees, a rival Jew gang of the aristocracy and priesthood, questioned JC about the relative importance of dead wives. JC notes there are no rivalries among heavenly angels as a response. (the scripture cited here by the Sadducees that JC thinks they do not understand involves the punishment of a brother that refuses to impregnate his dead brother’s wife. The verdicts were: spitting in the face; taking away his shoes; public ridicule. Dt. 25.5) The Pharisees counter-attack JC with a question from a lawyer regarding the primary commandment. JC replies to love God, and secondarily, to treat neighbors well. JC then asks the Pharisees what they think of Christ, and of His lineage. The Pharisees answer that Christ is the son of David, and JC cites Ps. 110.1 (reference to Jehovah in OT, not here.) where David refers to Jehovah as Lord, thereby making it impossible for David to be Jehovah’s son. Or not.
Matthew 23: Much woe on the Pharisees, hypocrites! But let’s talk hell for a moment. The Greek from which this American version was translated is talking about Gehenna, and I feel some explanation is at hand here. The Pharisees, while being surely condemned by JC, the place JC cites is likely a valley just outside the Jerusalem city walls. The exact location is a little unclear, but it is suggested this might be an east-west valley shortly outside the city. So, Christians can sling around hell arbitrarily, but there are quite often very real distinctions regarding place and context that must occasionally be considered. I thought this was one of those times, but in any event, JC is not fond of the way the Pharisees conduct their business, and this chapter outlines his specific grievances quite thoroughly. Kinda talks some shit on Jerusalem as well.
Matthew 24: The end is near. Gnashing of teeth. Long, painful chapter. Some will be chosen, some won’t; people shouldn’t listen to prophets because all are false prophets, and those chosen will be gone anyway once shit goes down.
Matthew 25: Parables: Ten virgins go to meet the bridegroom, but five (as is true in most cases) are smarter than the other five, and take oil with them for their lamps/torches. When torches are needed, the five that are smarter, I presume, share a husband. Next, JC delivers an economic lesson on distribution and investment, and casts a weird eye on the contribution of savings to the micro trends at play here. Investment is strongly encouraged. It’s a pretty good lesson on the multiplier effect, depending on the translated edition. I’m probably missing the point on some level, (as usual) but it almost looks like these are the oldest economic writings I’ve read. I know other civilizations had some advanced economic development and writings… I’m not an economics historian, sadly, and I think this was intended to serve as a parable. We jumped from one of the worst reads in the entire volume thus far to one of the more interesting ones, and it almost feels like there is a separate author narrating the action at the jump from 24 to 25. Maybe it was just the result of the first decent night’s sleep in a week.
Matthew 26: JC then informs the disciples he’s in trouble two days after the Passover. Caiaphas, the high priest was currently conspiring to put a hit on JC. If JC didn’t have woman problems before this point, they become evident when an unidentified woman slathers JC with an expensive ointment. This occurred in Bethany, at Simon the leper’s house. Poor Simon. Shit. The disciples question the waste, and perhaps the taste of this endeavor, but JC replies that they shouldn’t be bothering the woman, who is doing good things in preparation of JC’s death. This prompts Judas Iscariot to “sell high” at 30 pieces (not sheckels) of silver. JC announces to the disciples to eat of his body, and to drink of his cup the blood of the new testament/covenant. (these are the choices here! I don’t see where covenant came down in usage over the years from new, if that was the linguistic evolution. Stylistic preference, I guess, or maybe an error in proofreading. The editors blather on and on apologizing for mistakes in the 1885 revision onward.) After dining, where JC outs JI as a traitor, and after a hymn, back to the mount of Olives. JC tells Peter of Peter’s coming denial of JC. Peter denies he will deny. JC gets sad with the original God party, Peter, James, and John. (Kind of feels like a Beatles recording in 1970.) At Gethsemane, the God party are put on watch for a JC prayer session, but they fall asleep at the guard. (It’s unclear how much sleep these guys are getting, but it looks like a pretty active time.) Three times, JC goes off to pray, and three times he returns to the God party at rest. But JI doesn’t care, because he got the silver, and he intercepts the God party’s camp. It looks like it’s going to be a fight, but JC advises against the fight, allowing prophecy’s fulfillment. Apostles scatter. At what reads to be “the trial before the Sanhedrin” in the marginal notes, Jesus is taken before a local assembly of 23 judges at the house of Caiaphas. JC kind of admits to being at the right hand of God evermore, resulting in a judge renting himself of garments, and JC to be spit on, slapped around, and mocked publically. Peter, in attendance for the hearing, denies he knows JC to a maid, to another maid, and to a passer-by, at which point the cock crows thrice, fulfilling prophecy.
Matthew 27: JC is delivered to Governor Pilate. Judas repents, returning the silver to the sanctuary of the chief priests and elders, and then hangs himself. The chief priests don’t know what to do with the money, because now they curiously consider it blood money, even though it was initially blood money. It looks like the money was used in a donation to a potter’s field, and it is very unclear the authority by which this action takes place. Pilate does what he can, recognizing JC as a righteous man. Pilate offers up the bloodthirsty crowd a choice of freedom between JC and another popular prisoner, Barabbas. The crowd elects to free Barabbas. It appears JC has made some enemies among the general population at this point. Pilate literally and symbolically washes his hands of the situation on delivery of Barabbas to freedom and JC to condemnation. The soldiers of Pilate then make a big deal of JC’s condemnation and mocking at the Praetorium/palace, and get the show on the road with Simon of Cyrene helping bear the burden of the cross. At Golgotha, JC and a pair of robbers are crucified together, and JC is relentlessly mocked and taunted by the other two fuckers getting simultaneously killed! At JC’s end, he cries “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” (My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?) The earth quakes, apparently fracturing the temple, upon the lifting of JC’s spirit. Joseph asks for, and receives the body of JC, wraps it in a cloth, and entombs it, sealed in stone. Many women were there ministering unto JC, including Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James and Joses, and the mother of the sons of Zebedee. Pilate knows trouble is yet brewing, and he takes the sound advice to place a guard at Jesus’ tomb, for there were also a great many who were allies of JC…
Matthew 28: At dawn at the first day of the week after Sabbath, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary came to see the sepulchre. Another earthquake, resulting in an angel sitting on the now moved stone, who tells the women not to fear, that JC has risen, go to Galilee to see him…so the disciples do this, and worship JC. Meanwhile, the guards of the sepulchre inform the court what had happened. The guards are paid to tell everyone that they fell asleep on the job, and that the disciples had stolen away the body. The eleven remaining disciples, though some are doubters at this time, are commanded to spread the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit all over the place.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Matthew 14-20
Matthew 14: Meanwhile, King Herod, overseer of John the Baptist’s captivity, has a bad dinner party involving his brother Philip, and more importantly, Philip’s wife Herodias. Herodias turns on Herod, who had imprisoned JTB for suggesting Herod’s lusting after his brother’s wife was unlawful. Herodias (I’ve heard something like this one before) suggests that her mother would like to see the head of JTB on a platter. She had been promised anything she wanted by Herod during a sexy dance, so JTB is beheaded, the disciples bury him, inform Jesus, who responds by feeding thousands with a couple of fish and walking on water during a tempest.
Matthew 15: JC defends not washing hands when eating. Healing and blessing and parablising, He is building quite a following. After eating with his unwashed hands, JC advises the Pharisees and scribes to watch their mouths. A Canaanitish woman’s daughter is cured, and multitudes gather. JC doesn’t want to send the crowd home hungry, so after three days he feeds 4000(women and children uncounted) with seven loaves and a few small fish.
Matthew 16: Pharisees and Sadducees demand a sign, but JC won’t deliver because they wouldn’t know it if they saw it. JC tells the 12 to stay away from their kitchens’ leaven, and he wasn’t talking about yeast. At Caesarea Philippi, Simon Peter identifies JC as true prophet. Peter named rock of JC’s church by JC. JC tells the twelve to get ready for his death in Jerusalem and subsequent three-day revival.
There remains much doubt whether or not popcorn necklaces were a topic of discussion on the mountain of Galilee.
Matthew 17: Six days later, JC takes Peter, James (also called Jacob), John (James’ brother) up a high mountain, for a party with Elijah and Moses. JC turns white as the light up there, and Peter offers to make three tabernacles right then and there, but Jehovah intervenes, stating pride in his Son. The three disciples prostate, but when JC touches them, they are left alone. JC insists the three tell no one about the God party on the mountain until after the rising (second notice of rising). JC informs the three that JTB was Elijah, fulfilling prophecy. The party happens upon an epileptic boy’s dad, and JC suffers the crowd to heal the man’s son. (The disciples had tried to heal the kid, but failed) JC informs the disciples their faith wasn’t up to snuff, as the epileptic displayed through an easy on-site healing by JC. From Galilee they came to Capernaum, where I think JC tells a tollkeeper to get the toll from the fish. It’s kind of a rambling end to what by all appearances should be a quite important little passage of literature.
Matthew 18: Teachings of JC: The simple are in good shape in heaven. When stumbling blocks arrive, remove the physical manifestations that transferred sin into your body. When people are sinning, address it individually, then as a small group, then tell it to the congregation. Forgive sinners against their sins 4900 times. Forgive debts as you would have your debtors forgive you.
Matthew 19: JC and posse depart Galilee to Judea, where crowds gathered for healings. The Pharisees ask JC, an unmarried man by these accounts, questions about the legitimacy of divorce, and questioned Moses’ need to put away his wife. (Dt. 24-1-4) JC dodges the question by claiming Moses suffered to harden their hearts, and steered the train off the tracks with a longwinded and confusing treatise about eunuchs. JC warns again that riches won’t buy anyone’s way into heaven.
Matthew 20: Moral of the vineyard laborers parable: Put off until the eleventh hour what you could have started at dawn. Pays the same. Son of man again foretold of deliverance to Gentiles for mocking, scourging, and crucifixion. The mother of the sons of Zebedee (James/Jacob & John) requests JC should place those two at his right and left hand, but this is poorly received by JC. No one is first in line in JC’s world. The two blind men at Jerico just want to see, JC satisfies the multitude there by granting sight.
Matthew 15: JC defends not washing hands when eating. Healing and blessing and parablising, He is building quite a following. After eating with his unwashed hands, JC advises the Pharisees and scribes to watch their mouths. A Canaanitish woman’s daughter is cured, and multitudes gather. JC doesn’t want to send the crowd home hungry, so after three days he feeds 4000(women and children uncounted) with seven loaves and a few small fish.
Matthew 16: Pharisees and Sadducees demand a sign, but JC won’t deliver because they wouldn’t know it if they saw it. JC tells the 12 to stay away from their kitchens’ leaven, and he wasn’t talking about yeast. At Caesarea Philippi, Simon Peter identifies JC as true prophet. Peter named rock of JC’s church by JC. JC tells the twelve to get ready for his death in Jerusalem and subsequent three-day revival.
There remains much doubt whether or not popcorn necklaces were a topic of discussion on the mountain of Galilee.
Matthew 17: Six days later, JC takes Peter, James (also called Jacob), John (James’ brother) up a high mountain, for a party with Elijah and Moses. JC turns white as the light up there, and Peter offers to make three tabernacles right then and there, but Jehovah intervenes, stating pride in his Son. The three disciples prostate, but when JC touches them, they are left alone. JC insists the three tell no one about the God party on the mountain until after the rising (second notice of rising). JC informs the three that JTB was Elijah, fulfilling prophecy. The party happens upon an epileptic boy’s dad, and JC suffers the crowd to heal the man’s son. (The disciples had tried to heal the kid, but failed) JC informs the disciples their faith wasn’t up to snuff, as the epileptic displayed through an easy on-site healing by JC. From Galilee they came to Capernaum, where I think JC tells a tollkeeper to get the toll from the fish. It’s kind of a rambling end to what by all appearances should be a quite important little passage of literature.
Matthew 18: Teachings of JC: The simple are in good shape in heaven. When stumbling blocks arrive, remove the physical manifestations that transferred sin into your body. When people are sinning, address it individually, then as a small group, then tell it to the congregation. Forgive sinners against their sins 4900 times. Forgive debts as you would have your debtors forgive you.
Matthew 19: JC and posse depart Galilee to Judea, where crowds gathered for healings. The Pharisees ask JC, an unmarried man by these accounts, questions about the legitimacy of divorce, and questioned Moses’ need to put away his wife. (Dt. 24-1-4) JC dodges the question by claiming Moses suffered to harden their hearts, and steered the train off the tracks with a longwinded and confusing treatise about eunuchs. JC warns again that riches won’t buy anyone’s way into heaven.
Matthew 20: Moral of the vineyard laborers parable: Put off until the eleventh hour what you could have started at dawn. Pays the same. Son of man again foretold of deliverance to Gentiles for mocking, scourging, and crucifixion. The mother of the sons of Zebedee (James/Jacob & John) requests JC should place those two at his right and left hand, but this is poorly received by JC. No one is first in line in JC’s world. The two blind men at Jerico just want to see, JC satisfies the multitude there by granting sight.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Exodus 31-40
The word count in the KJV of exodus is 32,685, according to this list. My count for Exodus (numbers and characters counted in my total) is 4,345. I'm down to 13% from 17% in Genesis, so I'm either making progress, leaving a bunch of stuff out, or both.
Okay, Aaron...remind me what Jehovah was telling me to tell you again!
Exodus 31: Jehovah continues an education of Moses: Bezalel, of Judah’s tribe and Oholiah, of Dan’s tribe are appointed by Jehovah specialists of all things: gold, jewelry, brass, Tent, ark, mercy-seat, tent furnishings, table, vessels, candlestick and vessels therein, altar, laver and base, finely wrought and holy garments for Aaron, and Aaron’s sons, anointing oil and sweet incense. Moses is again reminded of the Sabbath’s representative place as a covenant between Jehovah and Israel, and Moses is at long last given two tables of stone written with the finger of God.
Exodus 32: Meanwhile, below Mt. Sinai, Aaron is gathering earrings to satisfy Hebrew murmurings that they lack identification with Jehovah due to Moses’ prolonged absence. Aaron sees some handymetalurgists have made a golden calf, and Aaron proclaims the calf to be representative of the gods of Israel. When Moses returns, he’s upset with Aaron’s interpretation, and breaks the stone tablets given him by Jehovah on the rocks. Moses asks who is with him at the gates of the encampment, and the Levites join him. Moses tells them to slay the unrighteous, and in one night, the Levites take out the 3,000 worst offenders. Those who personally crafted the golden calf were also smote, presumably by Jehovah, but it appears quite likely the Levites were acting upon Jehovah’s direct wish. Moses asks to personally make atonement for the sins done in his absence, which I guess pleases Jehovah enough to spare Aaron, since he has many future garments set aside.
Exodus 33: Jehovah tells Moses to have the Israelites remove their ornaments. They do, and they wonder again about the purpose of their leaving Egypt in the first point. Moses’ tabertentle is placed outside the main encampment of the people, and on an occasion, there is much clamoring there, and Jehovah appears again before Moses. Jehovah reiterates the importance of the personal relationship he has with Moses, conceding that Jehovah will be gracious to whom he will be gracious and will have mercy on whom he has mercy. We won’t get into a logic lesson at this point in time, as Moses is instructed to place himself in the cleft of a rock until Jehovah passes, but that Moses will have the ability to know Jehovah was in his presence by looking at His ass. (None may view the face of Jehovah, or they will perish)
Exodus 34: Jehovah (name meaning Jealous) tells Moses to craft another couple of tablets of stone, and Jehovah can again do the carving. While back in Mt. Sinai for forty days and nights, Moses is again told that: Idolatry is forbidden, the covenant is still intact, the feasts are still required, unleavened bread is preferred for sacrifice, don’t boil meat in milk, and the stones were again carved with commandments while Moses fasted. When Moses descends from the mount, his face glows, so he walks about with a veil until “he went in to speak with him,” whatever that means.
Exodus 35: Moses calls the people to bring goods and labor required for the assembly of the tabernacle. Lots of colorful garments, precious metals, and acacia were brought by skilled people. A new requirement for Sabbath I hadn’t noticed is that no fires may be set in homes on the rest day. Perhaps there was an arson flareup in camp…
Exodus 36: Bezalel and Oholiab, General Contractors on the Tabernacle project, tell Moses that they have a surplus of supplies. Moses dispatches word to the people to cease delivery. Bezalel makes curtains and golden connecting clasps. It also looks like Bezalel was in charge of the carpentry as well, along with the silver sockets at the joints of the acacia. I guess a cubit is about 18 inches long.
Exodus 37: Bezalel also makes the ark, mercy-seat, table. And the staves. And the vessels and dishes. And the candlestick and candlestick accessories. And the altar. I hope for Bezalel’s sake that Oholiab was strictly the money man in their operation, because he took a hell of a lunch break during this project.
Exodus 38: The materials used in construction of the court, or atrium. The gold and silver used in construction are valued. The census of the people over 20 years are 600,350. Credit is given to Oholiab for his embroiding talents, which must have been extensive.
Exodus 39: The priests’ outfits are garmented. The crown was special, as it was engraved “HOLY TO JEHOVAH.” Moses blesses the workers.
Exodus 40: There is an allusion here by Jehovah’s discourse with Moses that the temple might be used only for special feasts (the three a year), but maybe not. Jehovah might have been referring to the initial erection of the tent, which was highly portable. Furthermore, any future moving of the tent and contents thereof was mandated by the presence of cloud/fire (presence of Jehovah) in the midst of the tentanacle.
Okay, Aaron...remind me what Jehovah was telling me to tell you again!
Exodus 31: Jehovah continues an education of Moses: Bezalel, of Judah’s tribe and Oholiah, of Dan’s tribe are appointed by Jehovah specialists of all things: gold, jewelry, brass, Tent, ark, mercy-seat, tent furnishings, table, vessels, candlestick and vessels therein, altar, laver and base, finely wrought and holy garments for Aaron, and Aaron’s sons, anointing oil and sweet incense. Moses is again reminded of the Sabbath’s representative place as a covenant between Jehovah and Israel, and Moses is at long last given two tables of stone written with the finger of God.
Exodus 32: Meanwhile, below Mt. Sinai, Aaron is gathering earrings to satisfy Hebrew murmurings that they lack identification with Jehovah due to Moses’ prolonged absence. Aaron sees some handymetalurgists have made a golden calf, and Aaron proclaims the calf to be representative of the gods of Israel. When Moses returns, he’s upset with Aaron’s interpretation, and breaks the stone tablets given him by Jehovah on the rocks. Moses asks who is with him at the gates of the encampment, and the Levites join him. Moses tells them to slay the unrighteous, and in one night, the Levites take out the 3,000 worst offenders. Those who personally crafted the golden calf were also smote, presumably by Jehovah, but it appears quite likely the Levites were acting upon Jehovah’s direct wish. Moses asks to personally make atonement for the sins done in his absence, which I guess pleases Jehovah enough to spare Aaron, since he has many future garments set aside.
Exodus 33: Jehovah tells Moses to have the Israelites remove their ornaments. They do, and they wonder again about the purpose of their leaving Egypt in the first point. Moses’ tabertentle is placed outside the main encampment of the people, and on an occasion, there is much clamoring there, and Jehovah appears again before Moses. Jehovah reiterates the importance of the personal relationship he has with Moses, conceding that Jehovah will be gracious to whom he will be gracious and will have mercy on whom he has mercy. We won’t get into a logic lesson at this point in time, as Moses is instructed to place himself in the cleft of a rock until Jehovah passes, but that Moses will have the ability to know Jehovah was in his presence by looking at His ass. (None may view the face of Jehovah, or they will perish)
Exodus 34: Jehovah (name meaning Jealous) tells Moses to craft another couple of tablets of stone, and Jehovah can again do the carving. While back in Mt. Sinai for forty days and nights, Moses is again told that: Idolatry is forbidden, the covenant is still intact, the feasts are still required, unleavened bread is preferred for sacrifice, don’t boil meat in milk, and the stones were again carved with commandments while Moses fasted. When Moses descends from the mount, his face glows, so he walks about with a veil until “he went in to speak with him,” whatever that means.
Exodus 35: Moses calls the people to bring goods and labor required for the assembly of the tabernacle. Lots of colorful garments, precious metals, and acacia were brought by skilled people. A new requirement for Sabbath I hadn’t noticed is that no fires may be set in homes on the rest day. Perhaps there was an arson flareup in camp…
Exodus 36: Bezalel and Oholiab, General Contractors on the Tabernacle project, tell Moses that they have a surplus of supplies. Moses dispatches word to the people to cease delivery. Bezalel makes curtains and golden connecting clasps. It also looks like Bezalel was in charge of the carpentry as well, along with the silver sockets at the joints of the acacia. I guess a cubit is about 18 inches long.
Exodus 37: Bezalel also makes the ark, mercy-seat, table. And the staves. And the vessels and dishes. And the candlestick and candlestick accessories. And the altar. I hope for Bezalel’s sake that Oholiab was strictly the money man in their operation, because he took a hell of a lunch break during this project.
Exodus 38: The materials used in construction of the court, or atrium. The gold and silver used in construction are valued. The census of the people over 20 years are 600,350. Credit is given to Oholiab for his embroiding talents, which must have been extensive.
Exodus 39: The priests’ outfits are garmented. The crown was special, as it was engraved “HOLY TO JEHOVAH.” Moses blesses the workers.
Exodus 40: There is an allusion here by Jehovah’s discourse with Moses that the temple might be used only for special feasts (the three a year), but maybe not. Jehovah might have been referring to the initial erection of the tent, which was highly portable. Furthermore, any future moving of the tent and contents thereof was mandated by the presence of cloud/fire (presence of Jehovah) in the midst of the tentanacle.
Labels:
ark of the covenant,
atrium,
census,
cloud/fire,
court,
crown,
curtains,
mercy-seat,
pure candlestick,
tabernacle,
tabertentle,
tentanacle
Monday, February 6, 2012
Exodus 21-30
Exodus 21: A truly awful reading of mandates by Jehovah to Moses concerning ethics and property law, including, but in no way, shape, or form limited to: Treatment of servants, death penalty violations (smiting parents, stealing men for resale, cursing parents, murder, improperly fencing oxen that have previously gored, etc.), livestock rights and responsibilities, cistern responsibilities.
Exodus 22: This chapter might even be worse than the last**, with Jehovah issuing decrees about: restitution, arson, usury, not allowing sorceresses to live, not fucking beasts, affliction of the poor, a subtle reminder about the sacrifice of all firstborn, not hating God, worshiping, and leaving dead things found in the field for dogs.
**What makes it truly worse for me is the concordance in the Spanish edition. I see Deuteronomy, Leviticus, and Numbers cross-referenced all over the place in footnotes, and having read these texts before a couple of times, I know the redundancy is just now getting started. Page-long instructions regarding the treatment of a Hebrew slave and compensations for nomadic farmers' misdeeds bear little relevance in contemporary life.
Exodus 23: More laws, fallow land after six years, three feasts per annum: Passover, harvest, end of year. Another reminder of firstfruits. Jehovah finally promises to drive off the Amorite, Perizzite, Canaanite, Hivite and Jebuzite, but not all at once. It will be a struggle, says He, but once it happens, the covenant is re-repeated, promising a homeland from the Red Sea to the sea of the Philistines***, from the wilderness to the Euphrates. Lots of land included with this covenant reminder.
***Presumably, the Mediterranean.
Exodus 24: Mt. Sinai again. Moses, along with 70 elders come near Mt. Sinai. The elders include: Aaron, Nadab, Abihu, Joshua, and Hur. These men see the presence of Jehovah there, under His feet a work of Saphire. Moses had previously written upon Jehovah’s command some recent occurrences, but Jehovah offers tables of stone with written law for clarity. Moses alone dealt with the cloud of Jehovah for six days, when Jehovah summoned Moses within the midst of the cloud. Moses then stayed in the mount forty days and nights.
Exodus 25: On offerings unto Jehovah: No cheap stuff. The ark/showtable (table of Showbread): Acacia and gold. All gold utensils and candlesticks, hammered. Follow the blueprints given thee on the mount, says Jehovah to Moses.
Exodus 26: Measurements for curtains. Specifications for curtains. Acacia specified for wood in the tabernacle. Joinery specifications for tabernacle boards.**** Specifications for screens.
****I may not be able to continue reading in Spanish much longer. This is miserable and altogether pointless enough in English.
Exodus 27: Specifications for building the altar and the court. Much discussion of fabric and brass sockets.
Exodus 28: Aaron is to be dressed as a modern-day pimp when ministering. (Or almost exactly like Mad Donna during the 2012 Superbowl halftime show)
Exodus 29: An offering schedule, with specific requirements therein. Looks to me like one bloody and very unsanitary tent.
Exodus 30: Atonement cost is a half shekel of silver annually. No more, no less. The washbin shall be bronzed. Anointing oil is holy. Incense is important.
Exodus 22: This chapter might even be worse than the last**, with Jehovah issuing decrees about: restitution, arson, usury, not allowing sorceresses to live, not fucking beasts, affliction of the poor, a subtle reminder about the sacrifice of all firstborn, not hating God, worshiping, and leaving dead things found in the field for dogs.
**What makes it truly worse for me is the concordance in the Spanish edition. I see Deuteronomy, Leviticus, and Numbers cross-referenced all over the place in footnotes, and having read these texts before a couple of times, I know the redundancy is just now getting started. Page-long instructions regarding the treatment of a Hebrew slave and compensations for nomadic farmers' misdeeds bear little relevance in contemporary life.
Exodus 23: More laws, fallow land after six years, three feasts per annum: Passover, harvest, end of year. Another reminder of firstfruits. Jehovah finally promises to drive off the Amorite, Perizzite, Canaanite, Hivite and Jebuzite, but not all at once. It will be a struggle, says He, but once it happens, the covenant is re-repeated, promising a homeland from the Red Sea to the sea of the Philistines***, from the wilderness to the Euphrates. Lots of land included with this covenant reminder.
***Presumably, the Mediterranean.
Exodus 24: Mt. Sinai again. Moses, along with 70 elders come near Mt. Sinai. The elders include: Aaron, Nadab, Abihu, Joshua, and Hur. These men see the presence of Jehovah there, under His feet a work of Saphire. Moses had previously written upon Jehovah’s command some recent occurrences, but Jehovah offers tables of stone with written law for clarity. Moses alone dealt with the cloud of Jehovah for six days, when Jehovah summoned Moses within the midst of the cloud. Moses then stayed in the mount forty days and nights.
Exodus 25: On offerings unto Jehovah: No cheap stuff. The ark/showtable (table of Showbread): Acacia and gold. All gold utensils and candlesticks, hammered. Follow the blueprints given thee on the mount, says Jehovah to Moses.
Exodus 26: Measurements for curtains. Specifications for curtains. Acacia specified for wood in the tabernacle. Joinery specifications for tabernacle boards.**** Specifications for screens.
****I may not be able to continue reading in Spanish much longer. This is miserable and altogether pointless enough in English.
Exodus 27: Specifications for building the altar and the court. Much discussion of fabric and brass sockets.
Exodus 28: Aaron is to be dressed as a modern-day pimp when ministering. (Or almost exactly like Mad Donna during the 2012 Superbowl halftime show)
Exodus 29: An offering schedule, with specific requirements therein. Looks to me like one bloody and very unsanitary tent.
Exodus 30: Atonement cost is a half shekel of silver annually. No more, no less. The washbin shall be bronzed. Anointing oil is holy. Incense is important.
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Exodus 11-20
Exodus 11: Moses tells Pharaoh about Jehovah’s plan to get rid of firstborn of Egypt, including cattle.
Exodus 12: Jehovah lays it down for Aaron and Moses: On the tenth of a month unspecified to be the beginning of the year, a perfect year old sheep or goat male is set aside for each of the houses of Israel. On the fourteenth, at evening, kill it in front of the congregation. Then, smear that blood from the kill on the sideposts and lentils of the homes that are to eat of the lamb and unleavened bread. Do not boil the lamb. Roast it whole over fire. If there are any leftovers, incinerate them. No shoes, no pants, no staff in hand, no Passover. When the above happens, Jehovah will smite as specified above (Ex 11). Then, for seven days annually, eat unleavened bread. In fact, take the leaven out of the house on the first day of the event. Jehovah sees blood, passes over Hebrew homes. Do not work on the celebration days bookending this week. To be clear, Jehovah reiterates that from the fourteenth to the twenty-first, this bread issue is important. The firstborn killing comes to pass, and the Israelites ask for treasure on their way out of Egypt, and the Egyptians are plenty happy to be rid of this plague Jehovah has brought upon Egypt. Pharaoh appears to have relented here, and the Israelites are told to get going quickly. 600,000 men not counting children depart from Rameses to Succoth (Another Goshen town in the Eastern Nile delta). 430 years the Hebrews spent in Egypt. There are very specific rules regarding who may or may not participate in Passover, much of it related to circumcision.
Exodus 13: Easily the most bizarre chapter in the bible so far, and that’s saying something. All firstborn males are Jehovah’s. Maybe not the Hebrews. Maybe so. Jehovah says one thing to Moses, then He says another, maybe in an attempt at clarity. The bread thing is reiterated again, and is damned clear. The consecration of firstborn looks like it might be troublesome, because there are instructions to kill off any beasts that weren’t offered initially, and so forth. After the confusing order regarding flock and/or man to serve as what appears to be a constant reminder of Passover, Jehovah guides the Israelites to the Red Sea, and it is a 24-hour operation. The Hebrews are led through the wilderness by day with a pillar of cloud, and at night, by a pillar of fire. The previously unnamed Passover month is stated to be Abib.
Exodus 14: Jehovah instructs Moses to turn back to encamp before Pihahiroth (maybe modern-day Arsinoe, Egypt?), between Migdol and the sea, but before Baalzephon. The Hebrews are a little apprehensive about this situation of apparent death in the dessert, but Jehovah tells Moses to cast the godstick above the waters of the Red Sea, and to gain escape from Pharaoh, now pursuing the Hebrews. The treatment of the pillar of cloud and pillar of fire is an odd one here, as the night of the sea parting, the pillar of fire is placed between the Israelites and Egyptians. (Not at the head of the Israelites’ encampment, as during the first parts of the journey) But the sea is parted at night by a great East wind, the Hebrews make their journey, Jehovah forces the wheels off Pharaoh’s 600 chariots, and a great many Egyptians are thwarted in their attempt to return Israel to servitude.
Exodus 15: Song time. Miriam the prophetess, sister of Aaron, gathers the women for a song that sounds a lot like modern-day soccer taunts between nations. The Israelites went to the wilderness of Shur for three days, finding nothing to drink at Marah. Jehovah advises to dunk a certain tree in those waters, which makes the bitter water sweet. On to Elim, with its twelve springs and seventy palms.
Exodus 16: The Hebrews murmur against Aaron and Moses. Jehovah instructs Moses that the Hebrews will be provided for, despite the general err of their ways. Quails descend on the camp at evening, and at morning, there is a honey-tasting Manna to be had in the fields. This entire passage could use quite a bit of clarification. But for forty years, the Hebrews got manna in the desert. More specific instructions are given about the seventh day being one in which no manna could be taken, but on the bright side, it was the only period for which manna could be collected in said abundance without spoiling.
Exodus 17: Moses tells Joshua to gather troops after tapping a rock at Rephidim with the godstick for water. Amalek is the foe, and Moses, Aaron, and Hur climb a hill to watch the battle. When Moses holds up his hands, the Hebrews win the battles. So Aaron and Hur hold up Moses’ hands long enough for Israel to prevail. Jehovah mentions to Moses that it might be important to write some of this stuff down in a book.
Exodus 18: Moses meets with his father-in-law Jethro, who advises that Moses start delegating some authority over the people, as Moses is quite a bit overworked, and not handling things too well. Moses, with Jethro’s help, delegates authority to assistant judges to interpret and pass judgment regarding ethics and law. First example of local delegation of the Hebrew authority.
Exodus 19: Three months into their exile from Egypt, Moses meets Jehovah at Mount Sinai, where he receives contradictory instructions about the preparation in three days for Jehovah’s address of the Hebrews. The clothes should be clean, and they should stay away from women and Mt. Sinai during this time. Or not.
Exodus 20: At Mt. Sinai, Jehovah shares with Moses some law: 1) No other gods before Jehovah; 2) No graven images or idols, with a thick emphasis on Jehovah’s jealousy; 3) No taking Jehovah’s name in vain; 4) Remember to keep the Sabbath holy. Much emphasis here; 5) Honor mom and dad; 6) Don’t kill; 7) Don’t adulterize; 8) Don’t steal; 9) Don’t lie; 10) Don’t covet. There are some further emphases placed on how Jehovah feels about the idolatry thing, and specific rules about not modifying rock with tools when building an altar proper for sacrifice.
Exodus 12: Jehovah lays it down for Aaron and Moses: On the tenth of a month unspecified to be the beginning of the year, a perfect year old sheep or goat male is set aside for each of the houses of Israel. On the fourteenth, at evening, kill it in front of the congregation. Then, smear that blood from the kill on the sideposts and lentils of the homes that are to eat of the lamb and unleavened bread. Do not boil the lamb. Roast it whole over fire. If there are any leftovers, incinerate them. No shoes, no pants, no staff in hand, no Passover. When the above happens, Jehovah will smite as specified above (Ex 11). Then, for seven days annually, eat unleavened bread. In fact, take the leaven out of the house on the first day of the event. Jehovah sees blood, passes over Hebrew homes. Do not work on the celebration days bookending this week. To be clear, Jehovah reiterates that from the fourteenth to the twenty-first, this bread issue is important. The firstborn killing comes to pass, and the Israelites ask for treasure on their way out of Egypt, and the Egyptians are plenty happy to be rid of this plague Jehovah has brought upon Egypt. Pharaoh appears to have relented here, and the Israelites are told to get going quickly. 600,000 men not counting children depart from Rameses to Succoth (Another Goshen town in the Eastern Nile delta). 430 years the Hebrews spent in Egypt. There are very specific rules regarding who may or may not participate in Passover, much of it related to circumcision.
Exodus 13: Easily the most bizarre chapter in the bible so far, and that’s saying something. All firstborn males are Jehovah’s. Maybe not the Hebrews. Maybe so. Jehovah says one thing to Moses, then He says another, maybe in an attempt at clarity. The bread thing is reiterated again, and is damned clear. The consecration of firstborn looks like it might be troublesome, because there are instructions to kill off any beasts that weren’t offered initially, and so forth. After the confusing order regarding flock and/or man to serve as what appears to be a constant reminder of Passover, Jehovah guides the Israelites to the Red Sea, and it is a 24-hour operation. The Hebrews are led through the wilderness by day with a pillar of cloud, and at night, by a pillar of fire. The previously unnamed Passover month is stated to be Abib.
Exodus 14: Jehovah instructs Moses to turn back to encamp before Pihahiroth (maybe modern-day Arsinoe, Egypt?), between Migdol and the sea, but before Baalzephon. The Hebrews are a little apprehensive about this situation of apparent death in the dessert, but Jehovah tells Moses to cast the godstick above the waters of the Red Sea, and to gain escape from Pharaoh, now pursuing the Hebrews. The treatment of the pillar of cloud and pillar of fire is an odd one here, as the night of the sea parting, the pillar of fire is placed between the Israelites and Egyptians. (Not at the head of the Israelites’ encampment, as during the first parts of the journey) But the sea is parted at night by a great East wind, the Hebrews make their journey, Jehovah forces the wheels off Pharaoh’s 600 chariots, and a great many Egyptians are thwarted in their attempt to return Israel to servitude.
Exodus 15: Song time. Miriam the prophetess, sister of Aaron, gathers the women for a song that sounds a lot like modern-day soccer taunts between nations. The Israelites went to the wilderness of Shur for three days, finding nothing to drink at Marah. Jehovah advises to dunk a certain tree in those waters, which makes the bitter water sweet. On to Elim, with its twelve springs and seventy palms.
Exodus 16: The Hebrews murmur against Aaron and Moses. Jehovah instructs Moses that the Hebrews will be provided for, despite the general err of their ways. Quails descend on the camp at evening, and at morning, there is a honey-tasting Manna to be had in the fields. This entire passage could use quite a bit of clarification. But for forty years, the Hebrews got manna in the desert. More specific instructions are given about the seventh day being one in which no manna could be taken, but on the bright side, it was the only period for which manna could be collected in said abundance without spoiling.
Exodus 17: Moses tells Joshua to gather troops after tapping a rock at Rephidim with the godstick for water. Amalek is the foe, and Moses, Aaron, and Hur climb a hill to watch the battle. When Moses holds up his hands, the Hebrews win the battles. So Aaron and Hur hold up Moses’ hands long enough for Israel to prevail. Jehovah mentions to Moses that it might be important to write some of this stuff down in a book.
Exodus 18: Moses meets with his father-in-law Jethro, who advises that Moses start delegating some authority over the people, as Moses is quite a bit overworked, and not handling things too well. Moses, with Jethro’s help, delegates authority to assistant judges to interpret and pass judgment regarding ethics and law. First example of local delegation of the Hebrew authority.
Exodus 19: Three months into their exile from Egypt, Moses meets Jehovah at Mount Sinai, where he receives contradictory instructions about the preparation in three days for Jehovah’s address of the Hebrews. The clothes should be clean, and they should stay away from women and Mt. Sinai during this time. Or not.
Exodus 20: At Mt. Sinai, Jehovah shares with Moses some law: 1) No other gods before Jehovah; 2) No graven images or idols, with a thick emphasis on Jehovah’s jealousy; 3) No taking Jehovah’s name in vain; 4) Remember to keep the Sabbath holy. Much emphasis here; 5) Honor mom and dad; 6) Don’t kill; 7) Don’t adulterize; 8) Don’t steal; 9) Don’t lie; 10) Don’t covet. There are some further emphases placed on how Jehovah feels about the idolatry thing, and specific rules about not modifying rock with tools when building an altar proper for sacrifice.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)